Trust Jesus

Sometimes those words are comforting, sometimes it's like nails on a chalkboard... Yes, we know we're to trust Jesus but sometimes it's just not that easy. I don't know if anyone else has noticed the [now] faded sign on I-69 south bound just past the Gaither Studio sign (a few miles north of Hwy 28). It is nailed to a telephone pole 25 feet off the road and sometimes obscured by a small tree.
Casey has just had surgery within the last few weeks. Since our deductible is met, we pay 20% of the cost. After having the surgery, we've come to find out that the surgery was double the original amount, and then later it jumped to more than three times the original number. This has really become a struggle for us trying to figure out where the money will come from. I wasn't thrilled with the second amount, but had dealt with it. Casey called me very upset when the number climbed higher, because of my previous reaction.
Where the two stories meet is on I-69. I was really struggling with our situation when I drove by the sign yet again. I immediately felt a sense of calm, knowing God's truth. Soon after, we figured out that our remaining contribution limits for Casey are close to what we were going to pay originally. This is entirely manageable! Yet again God has blessed us.

I CAN'T count the number of times on one hand that the "Trust Jesus" sign has helped me. Next time you drive south on I-69 from somewhere up north, take a moment to look for the sign...it may just make your day a little better.

Or worse...

In our wedding vows, it says "for better or worse". The last few days since Casey's surger, I've been helping take care of Casey. I know Casey is trying hard to do what she can for herself, but there's not a whole lot she can do right now.

When I took those vows, I wasn't thinking about this kind of situation (I'd imagine, most people probably do the same). I get calls 2-3 times an hour (during waking hours) to get a drink, to add a pillow, or numerous other things.

This is all time consuming, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Would I like to do it forever and ever? Well no. If it were necessary, would I do it? Absolutely, and I would be thankful every day. I'm thankful for this opportunity God has given me to do for more than just myself. I feel better because it takes my focus off of me.

Beautiful car, crazy speed!

An unbelievable video! The first car I ever drove was a 1931 Ford Model A. This is a '29 that has been tweaked...roughly 10 times the original power, but is a beautiful piece of work. Now the question is, how do I convince Grandpa to let me do this to his Model A?

A funny video

I don't know if you have driven your car on ice yet, but I felt like I was doing this till the roads cleared today.

Eric

Shivers down my spine

Have you ever heard a song that just gave you the chills? Sometimes a song is just capable of touching your heart. The new song "Down the Road" by Kenny Chesney and Mac McAnally is just one of those songs. It asks "is he washed in the blood or just in the water". I really like the message of this song.

I hope it does the same for you as it did for me.

Rich People Problems Part II

Have you ever had someone ask you what you would like for Christmas, and you can't come up with anything? After quite a bit of time thinking, I've come up with only 2 things: a desk lamp that will goose neck over my computer monitors, and lighting for my garage. So far I've come up with nothing else.

Yeah, I do want a nice new big TV, a new car, etc. I can't ask for any of that. Either its too expensive, or I feel like it would be asking too much of someone. This isn't really the odd part though.

Here's the kicker. I recently decided I want to build a media computer for my home theater set up (okay so it's not a big screen and stadium seating, but I digress). I found and obtained an Xbox 360 that was broken to use as the case. I picked out the parts that I wanted inside, but then I decided that's not what I want.

Normally, you hear about money not buying you happiness. People spend all their money on stuff thinking it will make them happy. I don't even get to the purchasing part before I decide there's something else I've got to have. I'm beginning to think this is due to my wine tastes and my Kool Aid budget. I have the taste for a 1787 Chateau Lafite Bordeaux (I Googled "best wine ever" to come up with the wine name :D ) but the budget for a $.22 Kool Aid. By the time I have started earning the money, I've become discouraged with the toy I want and look elsewhere.

I'm not entirely sure where this is post going, but I feel like there's something more here I need to gather from this. Obviously, money and toys don't buy happiness, and maybe I'm just stumbling ahead of the curve because I'm frustrated. I guess I just take so much for granted, maybe this is how I'm paying for that.

Rich people problems

Lately, I've been struggling with burn out. I'm tired of school (rich people problem), I'm bored of surfing the Internet to read about things I want do to my car but can't afford (still a rich people problem), I'm burnt out on not being able to purchase any toys (a rich people problem), and I need a vacation but I'm out of time off (yet another rich people problem).

I'm not complaining just to complain. I really don't have enough margin in my life, and I'm clueless as to how to fix that. I don't watch TV (maybe 60 minutes a week, if that), I don't go out and do things because I can't afford to.

I love to learn, which is why I do a lot of reading on the 'net, but I'm getting frustrated because I can't go do any of the things I reading about. Here's the craziest part, my job is actually the least stressful part of my week, and I look forward to going to work after a crazy weekend of homework because I DON'T HAVE TO DO HOMEWORK!

On a good note, I have 6 classes left to graduate from Ivy Tech, and I'm scheduled for 3 classes next semester. Hopefully I'll be done by next fall! YAY!

Me, Myself, and Irene

So, yet another night I can't sleep. It's well after 1 am, and I've not begun to snooze yet...I guess I'll do a post to try and settle my mind so I can sleep.

Okay, maybe I put one too many names on there, but the split personality is my target. I know where I want to go with this, but whether the words end up reflecting that target or not, I'm not sure.

When it comes to socializing, I'm sure I'm not the only one here, but there's the Me everyone knows, and there's the Myself that I know. I struggle with what I let others see. Growing up, image was very ingrained in my upbringing. I have people close to me (who shall remain nameless) that wouldn't buy alcohol locally because someone might see them buying it and think poorly of them. This isn't to say they were/are irresponsible with it, but image was everything. As time passes, I'm trying to rid myself of that.

I personally would rather go to the bar, have some social time (and maybe or maybe not have alcohol), and make sure others get home safely, than to hide what I'm doing for fear of judgment. But the question is, where do I draw the line between personal life, and being real? I have struggles much as anyone with a heartbeat and breath in their lungs does, but that doesn't mean I want to share them.

People see me as being[at least I hope] a good guy, trustworthy, and who knows what else. I've always stayed away from the spotlight for fear of people not liking who they saw. I crack jokes because I enjoy them, but also because it keeps others from having time to get to know me deep down where I'm uncomfortable.

I'm not sure where anybody else is, but I'm ruled by my fears. No matter how hard I try, I have the fear that others won't approve of me. I'm often somewhat quiet in a group because I don't want to be the center of attention. I did everything I could do in school to blend in, because those who stood out got picked on. For this reason, I often don't speak my opinion. If I were to make a statement about something that was right, someone could be sore about it and retaliate, if I were wrong, then people like to rub it in--neither situation is positive. I struggle to speak my mind even on meaningless tasks in my daily life. Thank God that I have Casey to help pull me through the awkwardness and help me to be a better communicator.

I guess my biggest problem is that fear of rejection. I look up to those who can speak their mind and are able to deal with the consequences, good or bad. I struggle with that even to those who are close friends and family. I just wish I knew how to deal with my problems.

As always, comments are welcomed and appreciated. Now maybe I can get some sleep.

Something hit me today

Sorry for the loooooong time between updates, but I haven't had much to say--until today that is.

Have you ever heard the saying "burning the candle at both ends"? Have you ever thought about the meaning of that? If you took a candle, turned it sideways and set each end on fire, it would quickly make a mess on the table or floor, burn quickly, and then burn out.

With school and work being a constant in my life, I'm doing exactly that. The mess is my life, forgetting things, not having time to work on things that desperately need attention, and not having time for myself or my wonderful wife.

The burn out is what happens when there's no down time to recuperate. Casey and I are both at the point of burn out...I'm getting to the point where I don't really care about school--not a good thing.

Since Casey and I don't really have time for a growth group, we started reading a couple books last night. We both read a bit in "LOVE & RESPECT: the love she desperately needs, the respect he really deserves", and each started devotional books. Hopefully being closer to our God will bring us closer together and help us deal with stress better.

Hopefully my next post won't have to wait as long as this one has.

Overdue update

I decided today that I needed to update my blog. It's been far too long since I did so. I am just about to start my 3rd week of classes, and I'm already overwhelmed. I didn't have a chance to do my homework this past week, so I'm cramming it all into this weekend. I got 2 of my classes done/almost done yesterday, and I'm working on the rest today.

Unfortunately, I'm having a bit of difficulty concentrating on my studies because of my allergies. I haven't had to deal with them for quite a while, but they have beaten me up badly. I've probably been through a half box of Kleenex so far, and I'll probably end up near a full box just this weekend. My nose looks like Bozo the Clown's nose . :-(

Please keep Casey and me in your prayers for our sanity and well being.

Eric

My wife...my blessing

The other day I saw a wall decoration that said "God grant me the patience to deal with my blessings." Well God has definitely made that stand out in my mind. I've always been pretty poor in communications with others. I do 'okay' in social situations, but not well...and I have always struggled with communication with my wife. Thank goodness my wife is so great at it.

Slowly but surely, I'm being yanked from my shell (the one that isolates me from having to share how I feel--yeah, yeah I feel dirty just saying that!). My wife does very well communicating, but that has never been my forte. She is definitely my complement...and my better half. Thanks to her patience and ability to pull me out of my shell, I feel so much more comfortable talking about things with her now than ever before.

On a related note--and more to the topic of this post--my brother recently told me that he needed to find a good woman, and I told him that I already married her. My wife is such a blessing to me that I can't begin to express how much she means.

New blogger announcement

My incredible wife, Casey, has started blogging. I'm sure she can use lots of support in her new endeavor!

Please keep us in your prayers as we're about to be tested to our limits. I'm currently working full-time and she is working part-time, I'm about to start back into school and she is about to begin nursing school. We've made it over a year now (had our one year anniversary on the 14th of this month), but haven't had to deal with nursing school yet.

Phil 4:13 says "I can do all things through Him who gives me strength"...well we're gonna need it! Thank you for your prayers.

Obama and Christ

From the very beginning I have been a fan of Barack Obama. The fact that he lacks typical 'political experience' is not a negative in my book. Maybe I'm too cynical about our politicians, but between lobbyists and everything else I don't trust 'Washington experience'.

When Obama came along I felt like he had that fresh look to him...but something gets to me--and still bothers me: "I believe there are many paths to the same place, and that is a belief that there is a higher power, a belief that we are connected as a people." This is very obviously wrong...but he isn't the only one who has made this nature of statement. Our current president said this 4 years ago:

Charlie Gibson: Do we all worship the same God, Christians and Muslims?

President Bush: I think we do. We have different routes of getting to the Almighty.

Charlie Gibson: Do Christians and non-Christians, do Muslims go to heaven in your mind?

President Bush: Yes, they do. We have different routes of getting there.

I never liked Bush...but I'm finding myself between a rock and a hard place here. I don't like Obama's statement on beliefs, but I don't care of McCain either. I just don't know what to do, and I have the distinct impression that I'm not the only one.

Roll call?

Hey, I know there are a few of you who read my blog, and I'd like to see who is watching. Feedback is always helpful, too! So if you're reading this please comment just to let me know you're paying attention.

Thanks!

Running on empty

I am officially declaring that I want to live my life in a full manner. I want to get to where I'm living my life with some reserves in the tank. What do I mean? Well, more than just having a full tank of gas.

I want to live NOT paycheck to paycheck. I want to live my life without constantly feeling drained and tired. I want to live my life that I can have time for myself and my family. I want to live a worry-free life. Don't get me wrong...I don't want a life void of fun or anything like that.

When I was younger, I held everything on my shoulders. I had issues with ulcers and stress. I recently decided that most things weren't worth worrying about. I've been told that many people come to this realization when they have a heart-attack or some major medical problem where they realize their problem [life] is terminal. If I die tomorrow, is it going to matter that there's a few dishes in the sink, that there's a bed unmade, or a flower bed that isn't weeded? Not one bit!

I want to live with weekends where I can [mostly] relax. Working all week, then doing massive projects/running around all weekend, and then back to the work week is not a way to live life. If for no other reason than the fact that we are to remember the Sabbath and keep it holy. Never slowing down may be a way to keep up with the Jones's, but that life--THE Rat Race--is a way to NOT efficiently get projects done, or work for that matter.

I want to live within my budget. Having gas cut significantly into my budget means I don't have enough reserves. It is my sincerest hope that I can budget to live off one income (great idea if one person loses a job!), save half of the other income, and use some of what's left for play. That way WHEN gas prices go higher, it isn't a big deal.

I want to live within the time allotted to me. I want to budget my time to have time for my God, my family, and myself.

I hope that sharing this may help some of the rest of you. If you have thoughts on this, please share them!

Meeting the neighbors

When you move to a new neighborhood, you never know who your neighbors will be. I remember [waaaay back] when I was a kid, moving meant your neighbors brought over cooked dishes and introduced themselves. The apartment I lived at for the past year was nothing like that. I never did meet my neighbors from anywhere around me.

Well, fast forward to our new home. The first day I went over and met our neighbors a few doors down. It turns out the neighbors consist of a 60-ish widowed woman, and two men in their mid-40's. I introduced myself and quickly figured out the guys are living an alternative lifestyle. I have never felt comfortable hanging out with 'them', but these neighbors are really fun to hang around.

I feel like God is trying to open my eyes to see everyone as a somebody rather than stereotyping and shutting people out. After spending some time with them, I just feel like I need to share His love. I don't agree with their choices, but I'm still called to love them as people. Who knows what God may do through me!

Ordinary people

First off, this is a long overdue blog. We've moved, we finished school for the semester, went on vacation...all sorts of crazy things going on. Anyhow...on to the important stuff!

Hearing Kris give the message today hit really close to home for me. Casey has truly changed my life and blessed me in so many ways I can't begin to count them. I'm sure she has no idea how much she has done for my confidence, my happiness, my work ethic, etc. She is not the only one, but has definitely had more influence on me than anyone else (isn't that how it's supposed to be?).

Anyhow, one thing I've tried to do at work (and everywhere else) is to catch people off guard by giving them a compliment--whether it's to them, or more importantly to someone they are accountable to.

My reasoning is this: in customer service, 99.99% of the time anything reported to a supervisor is negative. If you do your job well, you hear nothing...make one mistake and you get crucified for it by others. Because of this, I have made it a point to tell others when they are doing things right (ever heard of positive reinforcement?).

What I've noticed from my experiment--I don't just randomly point things out as positive...all my experiment is genuine--is that you really catch others off guard when you do this. Want to have a talk with someone? Try disarming them with POSITIVE comments. Don't butter them up, THEY MUST BE GENUINE!

By doing this, I have noticed a change in how others respond to me (and occasionally others). God wants us to show his love, but many people will shut down if you try and talk to them about Him. If you spread joy by your actions, you may just have better luck when you talk to them.

Random thoughts and an update

Well, there's good news and no news...I took 3 of the certification tests, and passed the 3 I took. The 4th I haven't taken yet. I have a few more days before it MUST be taken, and I wasn't ready for it when I had initially scheduled it. I'm thrilled by this latest blessing--and the fact that I now have something to show for all the money I've spent on school!

As far as random thoughts go, I want to talk about getting upset, mad, ticked off, etc. IT'S NOT WORTH IT!

The things that make us angry most often are things we have zero control over. A few examples:

My wife curbed the wheels on our car the other day. A guy behind her wasn't paying attention when she got over, so she bumped the curb rather than being rear-ended. When she told me, I was upset that there was damage to our car--that we're responsible for. If she had been hit by the idiot behind her, it would have been the other person's fault. Personal safety not being considered here, the damage had already been done by the time she told me. I wasn't happy about the damage, but staying in a crappy mood because of it WOULDN'T DO ANYTHING!

Here's another...I worked yesterday to take care of some customers that are unavailable during the week. Casey knew I was working, and what I had planned on doing. Things were going great because I got the first job done early. Unfortunately, the second one didn't take 15 minutes like I had hoped...it took almost 2 hours. When I told her where I was, she was very unhappy about it--as was I. I didn't want to work on Saturday to begin with...but I couldn't bail in the middle of doing my work, either. I could tell she was frustrated when I hung up with her, but by the time I had gotten home, she was just glad to have me there.

Sorry for the long stories. I'm not trying to put myself up on a pedestal, but I want to share a way that God has given me a blessing, and hopefully let you experience the same blessing He gave me.

Quick update

First off, I have 4 tests for certifications in networking this week. I'm half-way through, and have passed both so far. Tomorrow's test I'm not too concerned about, but Thursday's test scares me. I'm working hard at studying, but this stuff is very difficult.

On another note entirely, I saw a bumper sticker I wanted to share. It said "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ." After doing some searching, the statement is apparently by Ghandi. Regardless of who it originated from, it resonates with non-Christians. I hope I'm not one of those Christians who do not reflect my Christ. I know I fall short of Him often, but I hope that I can set a good example and show His love as often as possible.

What a great day!

Casey called me the other day while I was at work. She told me that our dog had just run out the door and would not come back to her. We have been missing our dog for the last 4 days now. We called the local shelters and had heard nothing. Unfortunately, the dog didn't have a tag on her collar telling who she belonged to.

Fast forward till today. We'd given up on finding her. Casey called and asked me to go help a friend of hers with a bunch of kids she was babysitting. I was on the way over there when I spotted a dog that looked--just like mine! I stopped in the middle of the road and told the guy and he found my dog. He said he had her for the last 4 days! He quickly unhooked her and let me put her in my car. I am soooo happy to have her back.

I'm not quitting my blog updates

I've been super busy the last few days, and will be for the next couple weeks...updates may be spotty from now until then.

On a good note, we're continuing to see God support us financially for trusting in Him. Every day I'm seeing his hand provide for us, and time and again I'm blown away.

32nd chances

Sometimes people struggle with right and wrong. Maybe I should rephrase that--Everybody struggles with it. We all fall short of the grace of God. Sometimes we get 2nd, 3rd, 4th chances.

Someone I am close to has stuggled for a long time to find his way. He is going through a divorce, lost his license, and recently got fired from his job. He's really struggled with these things. Tonight I found out that he found a job right across the street from his new apartment. He may not be back on his feet yet, but it looks like God has given him another chance.

I know He won't give unlimited pardons, but He does give us another chance many times more than we deserve. That's just another way I see God showing me what He can do.

The easy way and the right way

Yeah, I took the easy way. I was supposed to be working on homework, but I was goofing around. I was asked how my homework was coming, and I said I was working on it. I wasn't in the mood to get into a discussion over my homework, so I said I had been working on it. Seems innocent enough...but it's not.

Not only have I been thinking about it a lot, but I know that it interferes with my relationship with God and my wife. It's also kind of strange that doing the right thing AFTER doing the wrong thing is more difficult than just saying "I'm NOT working on my homework, but I plan to in a few minutes," and I also have to deal with the repercussions.

I guess the good news is that:
A) it wasn't pertaining to something important
B) I did come clean

The bad news is that Satan can use that against me, to make me feel guilty and to try to get me to do it again. It also makes it harder for Casey to trust me.

That just goes to show that you can feel like you're doing really well, and that's just when you're the most vulnerable. God humble me and help me follow your will.

Laying down burdens

You'll have to forgive my blogging the last few days. I'm short on sleep and it doesn't look like that will improve for at least a few days, so these will be short and to the point.

It's really hard to give up the battle over money every day. I keep trying to pick that burden back up, and I know that I shouldn't do it. I guess the only thing I can do is keep giving it up, and keep praying.

Exhausted

My day went okay, I'm just really tired with school and work right now. I'm not sure how I'm going to put up with another 3-ish semsters. I guess this is one of those things where I'll only be able to do it by the grace of God.

I'm out for the night...maybe I'll have something of substance tomorrow. Tune in tomorrow. Same bat time, same bat channel.

Being fed (for April 12, 13)

I am so thankful for the church family that I have around me. I started this blog to keep track of how God has blessed/challenged me, and it has not only done that but become a source of encouragement for me in my walk.

I put a hit counter on my blog to see how many people view my page...there certainly aren't many of you, but there are more than I expected. I can't begin to explain how much more fulfilling it is for me to write my blog when I get feedback. Pastor Kris and several of you others are really helping me.

I want to praise God for giving me a church family that feeds me not only on Sunday mornings, but also throughout the week. My life is stressful (as is everyone else's I'm sure), due to working full time and going to school full time, and studying for my certifications. You guys help me keep my head up and I'm so thankful for that.

God bless all y'all! :-D

Being your own boss

My boss took the day off...sounds nice, huh? I was in charge of taking ALL his phone calls while doing my own work. I didn't get many calls--it was slow today--but it made my job much more difficult. My boss drives me crazy, but it sure makes me appreciate him more. I got some awfully strange questions today, and several of them were answers I didn't have or couldn't get. I'll actually be glad to get him back on Monday.

On another topic, I had fun playing Wii Sports tonight. I'm still awful at it, but I'm improving. 214 and a 6-in-a-row strike streak in bowling isn't half bad.

Maybe I overstepped a bit

I'm tired so this won't be a long blog, but I wanted to share about tonight. The guy I talked to yesterday didn't make clear what his offer was until today. It turns out he wanted to get me into a marketing thing...I probably could have made money off of it, but I guess I misunderstood him initially. Oh well.

I'm not bummed or anything. I still had a great day!

Plug into the power

Have you ever had a pedal powered headlight for your bike? If so, you'll remember that the faster you pedal, the brighter the light--and when you stop you get about .5 seconds of light before its totally out. This is what people have when they try to live their life for themselves, and rely on their own power.

This week has been all about the power of God. Apparently I found the power outlet connected to a nuclear power station. I thought I was doing fine with my little bike-powered light...now I'm being given sight and the Son's light.

On Monday, I had my prof tell me that I should come talk to him about a job if I don't have one by June or July. Today, I was working at a local school with their IT guy. He asked me if I had ever thought of working for myself, I said I had but didn't have the means to do so. He replied that he owned his own company and that he would like to get together with me if I was interested in working in the IT field.

I've never had someone approach me about a job before, and since giving up the reigns in my life I had two different people ask me. I don't begin to believe in coincidence, therefore I must give praise to my God. I may not end up with either job, but my confidence has grown so much from these circumstances. May God be glorified by whatever choice he leads me to make.

"Getting it"

There's something I've struggled with for a very long time. In light of some conversations I had today, and the link I found to Ben Stein's movie, I just don't understand how people can be so ignorant.

A large portion of the people in the US would say they either believe in God, or they are Christian, but many of their lives bear no fruit. One of my family members (an older member) grew up in the church of fire & brimstone. He attends church every Sunday, but appears to merely hold down the pew. He has lived a great life, and I have a lot of respect for him. My fear is that he just doesn't understand about being 'saved'. Several family members have tried to broach the subject, but he's not receptive.

I'm just confused as to how so much evidence can be there, and be very clearly true, and yet people just don't understand it. I'm think it has something to do with having a hardened heart, I just wish I better understood what is happening.

Have you seen this? ExpelledTheMovie.com

I just watched the trailer for this, and it looks really interesting. What do you guys think?

My latest blessing

I've always been a bit unsure of myself. I always tried to blend into the framework...and couldn't handle the spotlight for fear of criticism. I've started getting involved with stuff, and am becoming more comfortable with taking compliments and criticism alike.

Anybody who is close to me knows I LOVE to learn. If there's something I'm interested in, I have a hunger for anything/everything I can learn about it. I never thought about the benefits of this, just the fact that I can learn to do stuff myself and save money (more toys for less money!). Since I've started on my degree in Information Technology: Network Administration, I've been waist-deep in anything I can learn. In one of my classes, there are roughly 10 people...not a huge class. I don't pay much attention in class--but that's beside the point. After class tonight, I stuck around for a couple minutes just talking to the prof. He is self employed and does very well with his startup company. Out of nowhere, he was telling me that he was impressed by what I know, how quickly I pick stuff up, and he told me that if I am still looking for a job in June/July (once I've got my certifications in A+, Net+, and Security+) that we'd 'talk'!

I've never had a job offer before, but I'm absolutely amazed by his offer. Granted, it wasn't a true job offer ("I'll give you $xxx to come work for me"), but that really made my day.

I'm not a vain person, but God has truly blessed me with many gifts. I only hope that I can glorify him through my gifts.

Now if I can just figure out how to be as interested in the Bible as I am other things...anybody have a good suggestion?

My wallet and my heart

Jesus spoke often about money during his time on Earth. Money is what makes the world go 'round. I've somewhat worshiped money all my life. It wasn't money for the sake of money, but has always been one kind of toy or another. Tithing seemed unimportant to me growing up.

When Casey and I first started dating, we were tithing like we should have been (funny thing about really connecting with a church!). She changed jobs and we no longer had the money to do so. We have given a little bit here and there as we have been able to. With the upcoming financial issues we're preparing for, we wanted to start tithing again. Last week we gave some (not what we are asked, but what we were able). This week we had even less to give. We had settled on an amount on the way to church, and were going to trust that we would be provided with the money to make it until next Friday. When we got to church, a fellow church member cornered Casey and wrote us a check (a very belated wedding gift). That really made our day, and gave us the ability to give our full tithe.

Trusting God to provide for us through the current and coming struggles is difficult, but we're trusting Him one M&M at a time. The great part about the 'Wait' series we're hearing in church right now, is that God is faithful and is showing us on a daily basis that what PK is saying is totally true. God has blessed us so much, and that just helps us to become closer to Him.

Sin and soda (This is for April 5th)

Some may think I'm crazy but I don't care. I see a link between the two.

I used to drink carbonated beverages quite frequently. They didn't bother me in the least. I decided to stop drinking them because it's not healthy, and I've been without it for a few years now. Every time I go back and drink some (on very rare occasions), I notice it nearly makes me sick.

It seems to me that sin is the same way. If you constantly fall for the same trap, you get to where it doesn't bother you--as you begin to justify it. Once you've been freed of that sin, if you are tempted to and succumb to it again it really sits heavily on your heart.

Don't worry, be happy...or something!

Casey found out today that she can take classes for CNA certification on Tuesday and Thursday nights. That is a blessing and a challenge all wrapped in one. The first is that she will have to do stuff for her math class outside of class (because its on Thursday). Then clinicals will be Saturdays and Sundays at the end of her class.

The good news is that she can work more hours (as opposed to taking classes from 8-12 M-F), so that means we're more financially sound than we were thinking we would be. It's definitely not going to be easy, but it will be doable.

We've both been struggling somewhat with the money aspects of what we're doing, but we have faith that God will provide for us--not make it easy mind you--but help keep a roof over our heads and food on our table. It's very difficult to give this all away, but we've just got to trust that we'll get 4 more M&M's when this 15 minutes is up...that way we can eat :)

My wife, my best friend

My wife is wonderful. I don't tell her that enough, but I try to every time I remember. There are many things I really appreciate about her:

-She is outspoken. I don't have to worry about whether she agrees/is upset/etc.
-She fights fair. When she is unhappy with me about something, she doesn't cut me down but she does get her point across.
-She manages to remember all the stuff I can't.
-She works hard from the moment she gets up (about 90 minutes before me daily), and still manages to stay up as late as I do.
-Without her, I'd be late going places, I would have a horribly messy house (I really need to help her more with this), I'd forget EVERYTHING.

My wife is my best friend. She doesn't let me be lazy or selfish (that's a full time job by itself), and she loves me in spite of my shortcomings. I know I'm difficult to deal with, but she does it very well. What a blessing she is to me. Maybe one of these days I'll be the same for her.

God give me motivation

Phillipians 4:13 says: "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." I could use some of that strength right now to push on and continue doing my work for my classes. I'm burnt out on work, but moreso homework. I have 3 certifications to study for, 4 classes to do (for the certs), and a full time job. I haven't had time off--other than sick days--since my honeymoon 9 months ago. I need time off, but at this point that time off would be dedicated to studying (or maybe just playing Xbox and KNOWING that I should be studying).

My prayer for today is that God gives me the strength to carry on and keep at this.

I'm listening

I'm sitting here trying to come up with a "what I learned today" or something that God has been trying to teach me...but I'm coming up with nothing. That's okay though, I don't have to hear or learn something every day.

One thing I have noticed is that I am, and likely will continue to have problems with my tongue. What goes in, WILL come out...and all the music I listened to, all the movies I watched, and the things I hear my coworkers say all have an affect on what comes out of my mouth. Without a doubt, it has gotten better--but better isn't good enough. I'm not going to lose my drive, because I know I'll get to where I don't have to censor everything I say. I just have to stop filling my mind with them, and they will stop coming back out (eventually).

Count your blessings

I work in the security business, so I'm rarely in 'the office'. I spend my time in some really nice places, and some really not-so-nice ones. I got to go to a battery manufacturing plant today. I didn't even go into the factory, just into the office for the plant. It was one of the dirtiest place I've ever been, and it definitely makes me appreciate the other 99% of my job. I don't know that I could even last an hour working at that place.

There are definitely things that make you appreciate the things you have in life. That's just one more way God provides for me.

Our God is an awesome God

For my third blog, I'll try to make this short and to the point.

My wife has decided that she would like to be a nurse, and has started taking classes to get her degree. She was told that if she plans on working full time while doing clinicals, she may as well not start them. At the moment, we are barely keeping our heads above water, so this is very difficult.

I am working full time along with school, and cannot work another job (nor do I have any desire), so that puts us between a rock and a hard place. I have been a member of the A/V team at church for quite a while now, and had told Dennis that I can't keep this up any more...its too much time. So he asked me to do one more Saturday night, and I agreed.

The next Saturday, I got talking to another A/V guy, and was sharing my situation with him (he's working in the field I want to be in), and he shared some things with me that may well help our financial situation. I'm really hoping that this works out.

Fast forward to 3/30/08 service at church. When the pastor spoke today, I could feel a real tug at my heart. God was speaking through the pastor directly to me. I felt the need to go to the altar to pray. When I got there, Pastor Marggy got down next to me and prayed for me aloud. I had not told her what I was struggling with...but she sure knew exactly what my struggles were. Yes, there is some remote possibility that she talked to someone who knew my struggles and they told her, but I know better. The spirit of God Himself was speaking through her and to me.

I've never heard God's voice like that before, but it sure put a lot of things into perspective! God does care about me, he does care about EVERYTHING I do, and He can do so much through my weakness. I was absolutely floored to see the power of God working like this. Looking back, I feel similar to the Grinch when he learned what love was. My heart grew 3 sizes today!

You could've had a V8!

Have you seen the commercials lately for V8? The wife bops her husband on the head for doing bone-headed things?

Well, lately God has been doing that for me. Since I was little, music has played a big part in my life. In middle school, I bought my first rap CD, and consequently had it taken away from me. I didn't know what 'Parental Advisory' meant. I just knew I liked the song "Gangsta's Paradise". My mom didn't like the language, but there wasn't any content in the CD I had never heard before (or said). After that, I started buying lots of CD's, and 99% of them were rap. If there was a version of the CD's that was parental advisory, that was the version I bought.

The youth group I was a part of in high school had a great youth pastor who told us that we needed to be pure, and that included the words coming out of our mouths and the music/movies that we took in. I had no interest in letting God decide what music I could or could not listen to, and continued living my life how I wanted.

I mean yeah, I listened to music that wasn't appropriate, but surely music wouldn't keep me out of heaven.

Fast forward to my 26th birthday. I still have all those CD's but listen to mainly country music now. Some may see this as worse, but I digress. This is where God comes in. About 2 weeks ago, I was listening to some of my rap music, and I finally realized how depressing the music is and how offensive the music really is.

The only words that used to bother me were the ones where people take The Lord's Name in vain. GD, and J 'F' C really bothered me (and still do), but even the 'F' bomb hasn't for a long time. Well after I got the 'bop' treatment, I have decided that those CD's have to go. No more BAD rap for me. There is some out there that isn't offensive, and I will continue to listen to...one of them being MA$E's new CD. If you don't know who Mase is, his name is Mason Betha--or more appropriately now, Pastor Mason Betha. He was into the secular life, hanging out with P. Diddy and Notorious BIG, and has turned his life over to Lord God Almighty and is working to undo the bad things of his former life.

Anyhow, I'll tell more later.

My first blog...and a bit about me

You'll have to forgive me if this is a bit weak. I've never blogged before. This blog was started as a way of keeping track of my growth as a Christian, a husband, and a man.

I've been a Christ-follower (Thanks PK!) for most of my life...or at least a professed Christ-follower. I grew up in the church, and got baptized when I was 10. I had several close friends who were members of another local church, and ended up joining the youth group with them in middle school. I stayed in that group until I graduated in 2000. It was great, I felt God's presence many times, and I learned a lot about life and Christianity during those years.

When I got to college, I occasionally attended Bible studies and went to Campus Crusade. I never got overly involved in CC when I was at BSU, but didn't stay there long anyway. I was at BSU for 3 semesters, and didn't do very well when I was there. I decided to join the Indiana Army National Guard to pay for my own schooling (my parents didn't need to pay for my lack of worth ethic, so I joined the Guard). I dropped out of school for the next semester so I could attend basic training--or so I thought. I ended up not going to basic that semester, and got a job. I changed jobs a few times over the next 3 years, and FINALLY made it to basic training 33 months after joining the Guard. It was a big mess, and I ended up getting hurt during training and opted to get out of the military in 2005. From 2000 through 2005, I didn't really have much in the way of direction or drive to do anything.

In 2005, I decided to go back to school and do something with my life. I started at Ivy Tech and was working on a degree in electronics. I found a full time job (which I still have), and started taking classes. I made the dean's list the first time ever, and did well in school.

I was attending church but not being fed spiritually, but I figured that going to church was better than sleeping in.

In September 2006, my wife and I started dating. We had known each other for the better part of a decade, but had never been close. Soon after started attending a new church together in Farmland, IN. I started to grow in my faith, though it was difficult. After dating for three months, I asked Casey to marry me on Christmas eve 2006 with the blessing of her father. We got married at Farmland Friends Church in July 2007. The last 9 months have been difficult with school, work, and a new marriage, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

If you want to know any more, you'll have to check my other blogs!